This Week's Favourite Things! October 20th - 26th, 2014

1.  "Between the Hurricanes" album by Stephen Fearing, especially the song 'as the crow flies' (the super awesome lyrics are provided from the link). 

2. The Biscuit Eater.  Coffee shop/bookstore/restaurant in Mahone Bay where Stephen Fearing played; it's a great space and it was a real treat to see a famous Canadian musician play in such a small venue.

3.  Farmworks Investment Co-op.  Fantastic idea!

Behavioural Ecology Of Sociopaths And How To Save The World

Last updated August 28, 2015

*** This post is under construction and will likely take a few weeks or months (years?) of writing, editing and refining.  It is posted before it is finished because some of the links may be helpful to people. 

I've been reading up on sociopathy a lot over the past year and decided to stick a bunch of stuff I found out into this post.  I wasn't aware of how widespread sociopathy is, but suddenly a lot of things I've experienced make sense.  

The term Sociopath relates to individuals, however "Socio" means relating to society, and "pathy" means disorder, so by that definition a bigger picture look at what is going on with society might be of use.  

Since first publishing this post I've expanded my online research to the topics of Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Psychopathy as all of these disorders basically denote someone acting without a conscience.  There's lots of information out there on all three labels, but I'll use the term "sociopath" for convenience.

While my background is in the fields of  behavioural ecology and conservation biology, this is not a formal 'research' thesis, it's just something I'm doing for fun and to spread awareness of the issue.  The advantage of writing these ideas up as a blog post is that it permits links to articles and videos.  Much of the discussion will be anecdotal and opinion-based. 

If some of the issues raised deserve further investigation, perhaps this post be used as an argument for creation of a new, holistic, multidisciplinary field of study  eg. Human Conservation Biology that could include research in conservation biology, psychology, economics, law, religious studies and other disciplines.  It's occurred to me that current effort in the field of conservation biology may be futile if global economic forces are being controlled by sociopaths. ***   

Behavioural Ecology Of Sociopaths And How To Save The World DRAFT 

An informal thesis/literature review


Draft Table of Contents

Abstract

Introduction

Literature Review/List of Links

• Sociopathy 101 - a list of resources explaining sociopathy
• Sociopathy in Government, Business and Society - a list of all sorts of things that may potentially be impacted by sociopathy
• Antidotes to Sociopathy - a list of various links to businesses, ideas, movies, movements that could denote sustainable alternatives to systems at risk of domination by sociopaths 
• Sociopathy in Culture - a list of links to movies and other entertainment relevant to sociopathy and empathy

Discussion

• How sociopaths gain control -  a discussion to illustrate how sociopaths win people over.  incl. brainwashing, gaslighting, manipulation, the switch from empath to apath
• Suggestions for recognizing and responding to sociopathic abuse
• A discussion of codependency
• A discussion of the evolutionary adaptation of sociopathy
• How Sociopathy and Apathy can potentially impact environmental, community and individual health
• How to save the world -  Suggestions for how an understanding of sociopathy and sociopathic systems can be used towards improving just about everything. 

Conclusion

Abstract

Research indicates that as many as 4% of people, or 1 in 25 are born without a conscience.  These aren't just criminals in prisons, but people who are distributed throughout society.  Where their personality traits make them suited to reaching high levels of government and business, it may be valuable to consider the implication of this to conservation biology.   This literature review/informal thesis is intended to draw attention to the potential impact that sociopathy may have on individual, community and environmental health.  Many links are presented in this blog post with a discussion of how to prevent systems from falling under sociopathic control.   An argument is presented for the expansion of the science of conservation biology.   "Human Conservation Biology" is proposed as a multidisciplinary study that would integrate research in psychology, economics, finance, politics, religious studies and other fields of study.

Introduction

Sociopathy may be more widespread than people assumed.  This is in part due to the relative ease with which sociopaths tell lies, break societal rules, and their ability to win the support of apaths via bribery, deception and manipulation.

The objectives of this blog post are:

• to serve as a resource for links to articles and videos relating to sociopathy,
• to list systems that are at risk of control by sociopaths 
• to list solutions, including examples, for alternatives to a sociopathic society
• to help other targets of sociopathy feel better
• to help prevent people from becoming targets
• to inspire people to stop participating in systems that are controlled by sociopaths, or to change these systems from within if possible

While following a 'thesis' format, this post is purposefully informal and based on opinions and summaries of the literature presented, and life experience, rather than scientific research.

Sociopaths, left unchecked, have the potential to make their way up into the highest positions of corporations and politics.  So in a way, we are all affected by  Sociopathy whether we are ready to realize this yet or not.

In researching sociopathy the following formula came to mind as a simplified equation of what is going wrong with the world.

(sociopathy + apathy) x (ignorance +complacency + greed) = all the world's problems. 

Maybe the equation for all the world's solutions is:  

(empathy + internet + politics + sustainable business) x community x responsibility
 = all the world's solutions



In the months since starting this post I've read a lot about Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) as well as psychopathy.  While sociopathy, NPD and psychopathy may differ in various ways the underlying issue is a lack of conscience.  The following literature review includes lots of links to information pertaining to all three disorders.

Literature Review


Sociopathy 101 - 
A List of Resources Explaining Sociopathy

Books

The Empathy Trap: Understanding Antisocial Personalities by Drs. Jane and Tim McGregor

There is also a Facebook Page by the authors of The Empathy Trap who have written other books on the topic.

Psychopath Free: Recovering From Emotionally Abusive Relationships With Narcissists, Sociopaths and Other Toxic People.  by Peace

There is also a large online forum called Psychopath Free started by the author of the above book; this forum has many informative articles and posts within it

Snakes In Suits - When Psychopaths Go To Work.  by Paul Babiak and Robert D. Hare

The Sociopath Next Door  by Martha Stout.  This book alleges that as many as 1 in 25 people lack a conscience, and this is something that these people physically cannot help.   


Articles

Common Everyday Sociopaths by Adam Khan

Empathic People Are Natural Targets for Sociopaths - Protect Yourself  by Dr. Jane and Tim McGregor, Addiction Today

Have You Ever Been Duped By A Sociopath? by Jennifer Delaney, Huffington Post Blog

How To Spot A Sociopath - 10 Red Flags That Could Save You From Being Swept Under The Influence Of A Charismatic Nut Job by Mike Adams, Natural News

Inside the Mind of a Psychopath by Kent A. Kiehl and Joshua W. Buckholtz.  Scientific American 2010

 No, You're Not A Psychopath. Helpful article from the psychopath free forum for folks recovering from run ins with psychopaths

Narcissist or Sociopath? What's the Difference?  From The Path Forward website by Lisa E Scott

Pistorius Spotlight:  Protecting Ourselves From Sociopaths In Our Homes by Paula Carrasquillo, Communities Digital News

The Psychopath: A New Subspecies Of Homo Sapiens by Brent Kopenhaver.  Scott.net

A Sociopath Claims 'We Are The Uniquely Gifted' by Donna Anderson, Lovefraud.com

Sociopaths In Our Midst Hate The Truth And Its Advocates by Rob on Angiemedia.com 

Surviving the Narcissistic Parent: ACoNs (Adult Children of Narcissists). from The Invisible Scar site.

Posts on "Before its news" by 'Towards a New World':
The Detailed Portrait of a Sociopath
The Minionaters: How Sociopaths Play People 

When Narcissists Claim to be Victims of Narcissists, Who is the Narcissist?  From an upturned soul blog.  Very good post, which has a list of links to various articles as well.

Personal Stories

It Happened to Me: I Dated A Sociopath Who Lied About His Mom Having Cancer. by Iliza Shlesinger, xojane.com


Videos

There are LOTS of videos under various channels on Youtube, too many to list here. this list is some of the ones I personally viewed and found most helpful and/or informative.  I've quit embedding them to make the post easier to navigate.  Big thanks to the people who took the time to share their own experiences and findings, it helped me for sure and I'm lots of others.




Clockwork Orange Penguins, Narcissistic Abuse and CPTSD, a youtube video of a google hangout by the Spartan Life Coach

Codependency and Loneliness.  Why codependents stay with narcissists.  from the  Ross Rosenberg youtube channel

Covert Narcissism: The Wolf in Sheep's Clothing from the Ross Rosenberg youtube channel

Deep into the Minds of Narcissists & Sociopaths.  Radio interview on the Ross Rosenberg youtube channel

Defense Against The Psychopath (Full Length Version). by Stefan Verstappen


 



Do Not Become a Narcissist's Flying Monkey - Manipulation With Pity - Abuse by Proxy youtube video by Gail Meyers.

Effects of Narcissistic Abuse - youtube video by Spartan Life Coach 

Flying Monkeys and Narcissists. from the Narcissist Support youtube channel 

How Covert Narcissists Brainwash Their Victims - youtube video by Spartan Life Coach.

How to Deal With Narcissists and Psychopaths in the Workplace   Youtube interview with Sam Vaknin (a self-aware narcissist/psychopath)

How I Handled the Rage After the end of my Narcissistic Relationships - from the Narcissist Support youtube channel

How to defend yourself from narcissists.  Observe don't absorb.  By Ross Rosenberg.









How to take revenge on a narcissist - youtube video by Spartan Life Coach.

"If you're with a narcissist, do not...." - youtube video


Malignant Narcissists are Dangerous - from the Ross Rosenberg youtube channel


Narcissistic Abuse: From Victim to Survivor in 6 Steps youtube video by Sam Vaknin. 

Narcissism LIARS from the Narcissism Survivor youtube channel

Narcissism - Narcissistic Double Victimization from the Narcissism Survivor Youtube channel

Narcissist Needs Pity - from the Narcissism Survivor Youtube Channel

Narcissistic Rage - fromt he Narcissism Survivor Youtube Channel

The Narcissist's Social Circle - youtube video from the Narcissism Survivor Youtube channel

Narcissism Why We Can't Win - youtube video from the Narcissism Survivor youtube channel

The Narcissist Smirk, Smile and Grin of Satisfaction - youtube video from the begood4000 channel

Narcissists Emotionally Abusive Phrases to Watch Out For - from the Lisa Romano youtube channel

Narcissists: Five Powerful Ways Narcissistic Abusers Get Inside Your head from the Self-Care Haven youtube channel  

Spartan Life Coach Interview with Sam Vaknin on the online Narcissism sub culture.  This was super interesting "empath versus narcissist" vid.   Sam Vaknin is a self aware narcissist who goes on to challenge that victims who end up posting videos about their experience can come off as narcissistic. 


Very Skilled Narcissists Who Will Incredibly Seduce You - video by Dr. Sam

Sociopathy In Government, Business and Society

This section of the post will contain a list of industries and institutions that may have the potential to be led by sociopaths or sociopathic ideals.



Addiction -  

Addiction can present as sociopathy.  This isn't just limited to drugs, alcohol and gambling but could include workaholism, food addictions, eating disorders

Agribusiness

Genetic Engineering

Marketing and Regulatory Boards that punish small farms 

Monocultures

Pesticide and Fertilizer Use 

The fact that the largest Agribusiness Corporations manufactured chemical weapons for war and take government subsidies for farming methods that are water, chemical and fossil feul intensive.



Arts and Music Organizations

Where artists and musicians are often sensitive and empathic, members of these industries are at risk of being exploited by those seeking power

Business

Corporations are Psychopaths With Zero Degree of Empathy - a Natural News article listing off evidence on this topic. 

Wage slavery

Wal-mart: The High Cost of Low Price - a documentary 2005 

Charities

Where non profit work attracts empathic people, some charities may have bloated overhead expenses due to sociopaths, who have potentially lied about or exaggerated their credentials, having infiltrated executive or board positions, resulting in an inefficient use of resources

Environmental Consultants (Biostitutes)


Factory Farming


It is interesting that something so cruel and inhumane could have become "normal" in society.


Here's a video explaining how this can happen.  




And a relevant quote from Gandhi:  "The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated"


Fashion

The True Cost. very good documentary about the 'fast fashion industry' and the human and environmental costs to cheap clothes.  Might still be on Netflix. 


Finance


Bankruptcy Trustees as a for-profit business 

Credit

The American Dream - a cartoon






 

Investment Funds

Real Estate Investments  

"Ghost Cities" in China






Stock Market/Investment Funds

Bernie Madoff


The Big Short: Inside the Doomsday Machine.  book by Michael Lewis 


The Federal Reserve, and fractional reserve banking in general


Here's a video that addresses this: "Century Of Enslavement - The History Of The Federal Reserve"







Food (see also factory farming, agribusiness)

Fast Food

Fast Food Nation: The Dark Side Of The All-American Meal. by Eric Schlosser, 2001, 2012

Video talk by Eric Schlosser





Fast food, Fat profits: Obesity in America.  video. Al Jazeera, English





 High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar


Sugar: The Bitter Truth.  Lecture by Dr. Lustig, University of California Television







The Secrets of Sugar, episode of CBC's the Fifth Estate






Government

Corruption

How To Survive Corruption by Stefan Verstappen






Prisons - for profit prison system

War

Iraq For Sale The War Profiteers a documentary by Robert Greenwald

Weather Manipulation/Chemtrails


Illegal Downloading

By obtaining all of one's entertainment for free via the internet, this keeps creatives from being paid for what they do; try to support via purchases that go direct to the artists.

Media 


Manufacturing Consent - Book and Documentary by Noam Chomsky (1988)












Media Corruption - Leading Journalists Expose Major Corruption In Mass Media.  www.wantoknow.info





Outfoxed - Rupert Murdoch's War On Journalism - Documentary  

Pharmaceutical Companies

Religious Cults

Schools and Universities

It seems that it's become a lot easier to get into university than it used to be.  It also seems like universities are graduating more students than for what there exists jobs for, and more students are coming into more debt.






Society

The Psychology of Evil: TED Talk by Philip Zimbardo









Wall Street and Investments


Solutions To Sociopathy - Antidotes and more.  Note that any group is at risk of coming under sociopathic control, but this list includes systems that are conducive to individual, community and environmental health


Community Art

Handmade Parade - Hebden Bridge

Community Music 

HONK!  Festival of Activist Street Bands

Open Air Orchestra Society - aka The Carnival Band, Vancouver BC 

Playing For Change


Critical Thinking

Economic


Buy Local Movement 



Local Art, Craft, Pottery

Local Food

The Work of Vanadana Shiva 

Small Farms


Markets (Farmers, art, craft)

Halifax Seaport Farmers' Market

Co-ops

Farmworks Investment Co-op, Nova Scotia

Credit Unions

Crowdfunding

Financial Independence via frugality

Mr. Money Mustache - a blog

The Simple Living Guide: A Sourcebook For Less Stressful, More Joyful Living. book by Janet Luhrs, 1997

The True Cost of Commuting - pro-bicycling post from Mr. Money Mustache 

Peer to Peer Lending

Philanthrocapitalism

The Gospel Of Wealth by Andrew Carnegie


Sacred Economics






Small Business

Alvarado Street Bakery - Employee-owned, non profit bakery in California that pays high wages while producing organic breads.  Company Website

Education

Apprenticeship

Apprenticeship, mentorship and on-the job training for some professions could possibly be an alternative to burdensome student loans

Math Skills

Lecture by Dr. Albert Bartlett: Arithmetic, Population and Energy.  Dr. Bartlett believes that "The greatest shortcoming of the human race is our inability to understand the exponential function"





Empathy/Overcoming Apathy

Why Won't We Help Eachother Out? by Dr. Jane McGregor welldoing.org



Environmentalism


Books and Authors


Aldo Leopold - A Sand County Almanac

David Suzuki

Derrick Jensen 

Farley Mowat

Rachel Carson - Silent Spring


Eco-gift Program:  Federal Canadian program providing tax incentives for the donation of ecologically significant land to Land Trusts and other qualified recipients

eg. Farley Mowat gives Cape Breton Land to Nature Trust.  CBC 2007



Private Land Stewardship

Farming

Community Supported Agriculture

Seed Saving


Small Farms

Farm for the Future - BBC Documentary with a happy ending about how small farms and permaculture may be the sustainable alternative to oil-intensive commercial farming




 

Permaculture

Health Care - personal responsibility for health as an antidote to potential abuses by drug companies


Diet

Eat to Live - book Dr. Fuhrman

Food Matters - a documentary about healing oneself with food; also now a website and online community

Raw Food

Paleo Diet

Naturopathy

Parasite Cleanses

In my own journey, having traveled to many countries and having trekked in rough conditions I discovered I had parasites, which are apparently a lot more common than people living in developed countries realized.  After reading up on the Hermetic Laws I began questioning if my experiences with parasitic people (parasitic lifestyle being a key symptom of some with NPD or sociopathy) was a reflection of my internal world.  As I cleansed I felt healthier and less susceptible to allowing myself to be harmed by this personality type.


Independent Media

Jesse Venture: Off The Grid 

eg, Jesse Venture Youtube Video: Money Trail: Is Capitalism Killing the Environment?


The Corbett Report


Meditation and Yoga

How Yoga and Meditation Specifically Helped Me in My Recovery From Sociopath Abuse -  blog post


Real Estate/ Housing

Affordable Housing

Mudgirls Natural Building Collective, British Columbia

Renewable Energy

Microhydro

Solar

Wind 

Social Movements 



Peace/Spirituality - just some examples of contemporary spiritual teachers, links don't denote endorsements as spirituality is an individual's connection to spirit


Abraham-Hicks 

Deepak Chopra

Doreen Virtue  (angel therapy)

Eckhart Tolle 

Journey Of Souls: Case Studies of Life Between Lives - book by hypnotherapist and former skeptic of reincarnation Dr. Michael Newton 2002

Louise Hay

Spirit Science - website and Youtube Channel

Teal Swan

Unify - World Peace Through Inner Peace



Sustainable Resource Management (see also Farming)


 Aquaponics

Small Woodlot Management


Sociopathy In Culture

Stories and Books

1984 - by George Orwell
Animal Farm - by George Orwell
The Emperor's New Clothes 

Movies 


Films Featuring Sociopaths - horror movies aren't listed because there are so many

American Psycho
Animal Farm
Catch Me If You Can
The Ex 
Fatal Attraction
Jonestown - Paradise Lost - about cult leader Jim Jones
Malice
Single White Female
The Talented Mr. Ripley
We Need To Talk About Kevin
Wolf of Wall Street

Films about empaths

Gandhi
It's a Wonderful Life  
Miss Potter - Beatrix Potter left many acres of land to Britain's National Trust
Schindler's List

Discussion

as with the rest of this post, this section is under construction and will be refined into full sentences and paragraphs over time

How Sociopaths Gain Control

Brainwashing
"Gaslighting"
Lies, slander
Herd Mentality - what if the herd is following a sociopath? Behaviour leading to herd mentality - mirroring, social learning, aka 'monkey see, monkey do'
Switching from Empath to Apath as people that were formerly empathic find it easy to deny the sociopaths behaviour rather than to admit that something is wrong
Codependency
Weakness - sociopaths tend to pick 'prey' that are kind-hearted, full of integrity, and potentially going through other traumatic life experiences that make them more susceptible to being conned (eg, grief from a recent loss, recovery from an accident or illness, elderly)
Victim shaming
Ineffective, expensive legal system that revictimizes targets of abuse 
Changes to structure of larger corporations allow for sociopathic executive directors; from a shift from companies being run by boards to having one CEO or executive director (reference: Snakes in Suits)


Suggestions for Recognizing and Responding to Sociopathic Abuse


The Empathy Trap Book contains good advice on overcoming rumination and other aspects of recovering from sociopathic abuse.
practice excellent self-care and remind yourself that it is not your fault that people exist who will tell lies and break laws to get whatever it is they want.
confine sharing to close friends/family who understand the abuse that has occurred, other targets of the sociopath, helpful support groups/forums and therapists.  
realize that victims of sociopathic abuse run the risk of appearing to be sociopathic if they try to publicly defend or vindicate themselves.  Risks include appearing angry, or narcissistic, or full of self pity - these states just give the sociopath who is very comfortable with telling lies, ammunition to point at the abused and make them out to be the perpetrator.  It also puts the target of abuse at risk of victim shaming.  
Instead, try to stay detached and calm while fact-checking statements and promises that have been made.  

Accept the fact that there are individuals who are incapable of feeling empathy, remorse, or responsibility for the things that they do, and this is not something you'll ever be able to change or control. 

Heed advice from forums that discourage victims of abuse from reaching out to current victims of abuse by the same perpetrator; as these people are likely to be under that perpetrator's spell, resistant to your warnings, and likely to use your statements as something to gossip about with the sociopath.

Transforming negative experiences into positive via sharing of the experience in an empowering way - many survivors of sociopathic abuse write or blog about their experience both for personal catharsis and as an attempt to educate and prevent others from having these experience; or to aid in the healing process of others.  

Art, music and other creative activities can be used as ways to transform negative experience. 

So can using this experience as an excuse to focus on improvements to mental, physical and spiritual health.  

Recognize that while a grieving process will likely be necessary, prolonged depression or outrage over events you have no control over only extends the victimization.


Make amends and sincere apologies to any people you may have inadvertently harmed via apathy while following a sociopath.  In my own journey I was surprised and relieved by how warmly these apologies and amends were received.  In fact, in retrospect I question if the majority of people observing the situations I was in during periods of narcissistic abuse could see that I was naive and gullible as 'the child who goes off with the guy in the van with dark windows after being offered some candy'.

Immunize yourself from being the victim of future cons by identifying points in your relationship with the sociopath where you may have ignored 'red flags', or failed to do due diligence; or didn't listen to your intuition.  The act of taking some responsibility in the dynamic could help one to feel more empowered; note this suggestion isn't intended to come across as victim-blaming but is intended to be empowering.

Recognize that "people pleasers", codependents and people who experienced child abuse are especially susceptible to abuse as adults.  In my own experience, and I've read this in many other blog posts, I kept repeating the same relationship dynamic over and over until I finally recognized the pattern and why I would be attracted to and tolerant of abusive people.

Helpful links:

15 Traits of People Pleaser Syndrome - youtube video by Spartan Life Coach

Key Principles of Self Assertiveness and overcoming "People Pleaser Syndrome" - youtube video by Spartan Life Coach





Tough Love and Addiction - web page from alcoholrehab.com

Why Sociopathy exists - evolutionary adaptation of sociopathy

Sociopathy symptoms are similar to aspects of qualities of leaders. 

How Sociopathy and Apathy can impact individual, community and environmental health

Modern civilization has made it easier for sociopathic systems to thrive.  Modern conveniences may have brought along with them a 'learned laziness' or complacency for aspects of survival that certain individuals have grown to feel comfortable leaving in to the hands of corporations.  This may be a function of herd mentality and the fact that it easier to be led than to think for oneself.   For example, now many people get their food from a supermarket where they do not see the conditions in which their bacon pigs or battery hens were reared.  "Out of sight, out of mind".  Likewise it is easy to buy shoes from a shopping mall without having to think about deplorable working conditions of factory workers, or environmental degradation from slack regulations.  It is easy to put money into an investment fund, and to expect a consistent, decent return without personally researching how those dollars are actually used and whether the projected return on investment is sustainable.

The fact that many other people are already purchasing factory farmed meat, or purchasing items made overseas in ways that violate basic human rights, or investing in funds that could potentially be harming the environment in other areas of the earth, makes it feel safer and socially acceptable.  It is proposed, though, that at a soul or spiritual level different human 'beings' may intrinsically understand the brutality of some of these common systems that are supported, and internal 'knowing' may manifest as mental or physical illness.

 It is easy to get up and go to work for a job without considering whether a person's job description is actually a match for the work that person is doing.  Eg, 'conservation biologist' versus 'gathering data that will go into a report to sit unread on a shelf as part of the rubber stamping process for resource extraction'.   Or, eg, 'conservation specialist' for a western Canadian land trust who is asked to identify land that is owned outright by that company so that it might be logged for profit.  Whether the employee recognizes this cognitive dissonance or not, this person is likely to feel uncomfortable at a spiritual level.  This discomfort could manifest as mental or physical illness.


How to Save the World

step away from 'herd mentality' by fostering individual critical thinking and holding those in positions of power to be accountable for their promises and actions 

laws should some how change so that corporations are held accountable for human cost, community cost and environmental costs.  this might be unrealistic.  the answer might come from global awareness of these issues and the combined effect of many individuals changing their habits of money use.

resist temptation to classify all sociopaths as inherently evil - if only to avoid the us/them good/evil separation mentality that is part of the world's problems.   actions can be evil but if the prevalence of sociopathy is as high as suggested a better approach may be more awareness of their existence.  This could prevent a society from letting a sociopath to end up in charge of the country or a large corporation.  As an analogy, if you know you're living somewhere where there are swarms of blood sucking insects that will feed on you in your sleep, armed with that information you can take precautions such as putting screens on windows and using netting.   

Some people have sociopaths in their families where non-contact is less likely to be an agreeable option. In these cases maybe the emphasis should be on development of strong boundaries to insulate oneself against their manipulations, and on not falling into codependent or enabling behaviours that would only buffer sociopaths from the consequences of their actions

Fostering community and recognizing interdependence of all systems

Increased education about the prevalence of sociopathy in society.  Increased understanding that sociopathy may not be a static state but individuals can flux through states of sociopathy, empathy, apathy and codependency via factors such as addiction, stress, mental and physical illness.

Individual responsibility and empowerment: enacting change on very small scale.

- encouraging people to see their "dollars" as "ballots" that can be used to vote for individual, community and environmental health

-stop putting time and money into sociopathic systems

-encouraging even small shifts in spending towards local economy 

-resist puchasing factory farmed animal products, products with GMOs, high fructose corn syrup, sugar, other unhealthy foods, processed foods with potentially hazardous chemicals like nitrites

-encourage family and friends to value an organic, local diet that is mainly plant-based for its health and environmental benefits

-spread awareness of addiction and its impact while working towards recovery (eg. drug, alcohol, gambling, workaholism, food, sex, any other addictions)

eg. encouraging shifts in driving habits to reduce the number of car trips taken via better planning or alternate transportation such as walking, transit, cycling, carpools, carshare

-quit jobs in systems controlled by sociopaths in order to find occupations with those who aren't.

-work less hours, use co-housing to cut expenses, those people with means could look into setting up affordable rentals as a way of investing their wealth locally

-aside from food products, encourage awareness of the origin of all consumer products and try to select those that were manufactured in ways that are environmentally and human rights sensitive

eg. responsible investment: encouraging individuals with equity to take a very thorough look at where and how their investment dollars are being spent to ensure that this money isn't being used for purposes that are out of alignment with that person's beliefs and value system

Encouraging creativity in all people as a way to reconnect with spirit.  eg, practice of mindfulness, yoga, meditation and similar mental/physical exercises

Encouraging increased time spent in nature and on farms and gardens to strengthen individual connection to the environment 

-call out politicians on their lies and broken promises, seek to fact-check seemingly false statements, work towards creating new political parties devoid of corrupt interests.  more empathic, socially conscious people could seek political office

Conclusions

Despite the fear being generated by corporate-controlled mainstream media, all is not lost

This Week's Favourite Things! October 13th - October 19th, 2014

1.  Argyle Fine Art.  Yes. I've been eating crow all weekend.  Look, here I am on the internet letting the lovely owner of this business know (again, but publicly) that I am truly sorry for some conclusions I jumped to, for believing statements without fact-checking them, and for some actions I took.  I am sincerely grateful for her selling and promoting my work when I first moved to Halifax, and sincerely thankful my apology has been accepted.

Over the past few years I've become painfully aware of the difficulties of running a private art space and I think this business owner does a terrific job and is really a caring person.  The fact that she'd even have kind words for me after what I did speaks volumes to her character.  Everyone should go buy something from there.  Support local art.  Kudos to you, Argyle owner, your assistant and your artists.

2.  This quote:  "The best way of proving you have a mind, is to change it".  I read this on a friend's facebook account once but have no idea who was being quoted.  Maybe my friend made it up.  Love it though.

3.  My latest Life Lesson.

I'm up to Life Lesson #3 I think.

It's a good one, I hope all parents out there are teaching it to their kids. 

It is:  Be aware that there are people out there who will lie to you, and manipulate you to get whatever it is they want from you.

I'm a brutally honest person so I made the error of assuming everyone is just like me and tells the truth all the time.  

Plus my work/education background is in conservation biology, a field that, lucky for me, attracts really lovely people who care about community and ecology, and all living things.  So, ya, took me awhile to learn this lesson.  I think I get it now though.  Thank you, oh givers of this life lesson.

4.  Animal Farm!  The book and the cartoon!





5.  This public lecture titled "Who Are You?" by Dr. Deepak Chopra, 1993.  It is about how we're all connected.  We are! Even the ones who pretend we aren't! 

6.  This awesome video that is helping inspire me to cut back on the factory farmed animal products.  Thanks again, NS Turkey Board for inspiring my research into the world of agri-business.

This Is What Happened To My House

In March 2012 my husband and I rented our Halifax home to a young couple and their friend.  This post contains pics of the state our house was in when we took possession back on January 4th, 2014.


In posting this I thought of 'upworthy' titles such as "I rented my home to a housekeeping supervisor for a Delta Hotel and this is what happened".  

Or, "Are companies like BDO bankrupting the Nova Scotia Justice System?".  

The idea for this latter title came to me because my husband and I, upon evicting these tenants for not paying rent and trashing the place, went through all the appropriate channels for folks in our situation.   This took a lot of time, fees, and other expenses.  

In fact, this entire process struck us as a needlessly complex, expensive treasure hunt that spanned the entire Halifax Regional Municipality: several trips to the Bayer's Lake Tenancy office, then to small claims court downtown, then to Dartmouth for the registry office, back downtown to the Sheriff's office, with fees to pay at each stop.

I'll add here that while the tenants did show up to the hearing, they showed us no remorse or responsibility for any of the over $12,000 in damage they caused us, even after the judgement was awarded.  

There was no attempt to work out any sort of payment plan.  

Instead, the one with the decent hotel job whose wages we could have garnished went to BDO Halifax and declared bankruptcy to shirk their court-ordered responsibility.   

You see, for some reason the road to justice in Nova Scotia seems to end up at the door of privately run bankruptcy trustee businesses, who profit off of people like our tenants declaring bankruptcy.  

When we questioned the head of BDO Halifax about how our court win ended up thwarted by a for-profit bankruptcy trustee, his reply was "Well you wouldn't expect me to work for free, would you?".  

And, "If you think I'm going to just write you a cheque for $12,000, it ain't happening."  

We never expected or wanted this person pay us our judgment, we just wanted our tenants to take at least some level of accountability and make some sort of retribution.  

I find it ironic that the BDO Halifax head would have his hackles raised by the thought of working for free, because in the end he gets to profit off of our free labour: the clean up, the repairs, weeks spent in a filthy, rat infested house, court dates, court judgement execution and related expenses. 

Bankruptcy, apparently, is how people get away with wrecking rental properties.  Because we're not the only ones this has happened to.  From what we've heard, it has happened to plenty of landlords in Halifax. 

My guess is that the shame and embarrassment of finding your property, in this case our former home, in such a condition is what keeps landlords from sharing situations like this publicly.  

I'll admit, when it happened back in January of this year, our priority was to clean up the mess and get the house re-rented.  This took until April because of the damage.

But I've decided to post these photos as a cautionary tale for newbie landlords such as we were. 

We enjoy being landlords and providing nice homes for people with the lowest rents we can afford to offer, but from now on when in doubt, we request that a parent co-signs the lease.  

I also post these photos because I really think that tenancy board decisions that confer this amount of damage, including obvious willful destruction, ought to survive a bankruptcy.  

Perhaps the bankruptcy act needs to be changed to accommodate this.  

I've written some more about our experience with BDO Halifax, these thoughts are included after the photos.
 
So here are the pics...

Welcome to my 'smashed up garbage dump of a house tour of January 2014'!!

For starters, here is my brand new front picture bay window.  Apparently busted because housekeeper tenant encouraged their sibling to throw an axe through it.  Nice.

The front yard, covered with heavy garbage which took a contractor a few loads to the dump.

Trash piled into our driveway. In all my husband and I (mostly my husband, love you baby) removed 108 garbage bags of trash from the property, and 32 of these were the great big contractor bags.

Welcome to the living room! The beautiful new hardwood floors, lovingly installed by the former owners, were caked with cigarette butts and ashes. This was in part because the entire main floor flooded when the tenants reneged on their legal requirement to keep the house heated during winter.  The result was the oil hotwater baseboard heating system froze, burst and split the pipes in several places flooding the house.  The floors are now warped and the finish is ruined, but we don't have the money to replace them.

More shots of the living room!  Not only were the tiles near the stove all cracked, the new airtight wood burning fireplace insert was broken in ways that surprised the stove technician.  $$$.  

 It is worth noting that my mantle used to have a beautiful, antique mirror worth approx $400.  This was apparently stolen out of the house by some young male subletter,  apparently with the help of an older man (his father?).  A neighbour saw the mirror loaded into a van the night before the eviction date.  This mirror was a thoughtful gift left for me by the last homeowners - a very nice, antique-dealing older couple who were caretakers for the most excellent Waverly Inn in downtown Halifax.

Here is a pic from the cutsheet of my house with the stolen mirror.  I wonder who in Halifax is enjoying it, or if it has been resold.  At tenancy court we were told it'd be returned.  It wasn't. 

After we regained possession of our house, we got heating oil, had the line bled, and shortly found out about the heating pipe issue when water started gushing out everywhere. Lovely Metro Burner came to our rescue.  The heating pipes had to be fixed in at least 4 areas of the home.  

Ironically, before the Waverly Inn couple, our house belong to the grandparents of the heating technician who was sent over.  Small world! This fellow was clearly stunned to see what had become of his grandparents home.  We learned they used to sell square dancing clothing out of the attached shop years ago.  Fun!

Metro Burner guy's tools and stuff

Now, moving on in our tour, here is the room that used to be the master bedroom. Note there is a pile of dog shit in this shot; every room in the house had dog shit on the floor.  The basement had lots.

We realized later that one of the tenants was purposefully breeding her mutts to make money.  In the first year of the tenancy we naively believed the puppies were a one time mistake, instead this tenant had sold 2 or 3 litters for 200/pup. 

My dog, checking out the filth and other dogs' poop

My old bedroom ceiling! It completely needed to be replaced, and the room repainted, because of the water that gushed out of the busted heating pipes.

Lovely old character glass door, smashed up in a few different panes and scratched up by dogs presumably.

Welcome to my kitchen! Which, like everywhere else in the house was covered with dog shit and trash that had been torn up by rats and dogs.

 

Close up of kitchen garbage...

 

Filthy baseboards, which were also chewed up all over the house by various dogs and puppies.  Again, we just didn't have the money to start replacing things.

This oven took quite a while to clean!  And 3 cans of easy-off.  Amazing this tenancy was less than 2 years, but apparently our home was being run as some kind of drop-in shelter so I guess there were a lot of greasy things cooked here.

Moving along to the upstairs! Torn up dog hair covered filthy carpet, which eventually all had to go.

 

 One messy corner of the 2nd floor bedroom, and yes that is a big pile of dogshit at the front of the photo

 

Some more random 2nd floor trash.  Keep in mind that these photos can't convey the smells we encountered and all the ground in filth on every surface of our home.  The cleanup/repairs took my husband and I a few weeks of full time work each.

 

Rat tracks in my basement!  I lived in this home from 2008 - 2012 and never once had a rat in the house, a few mice yes.  Unfortunately because of the condition of the house rats got in, as evidenced by these tracks in baking soda we spread along all the walls....

... and just a few of the rat droppings in the basement...

... and 3 big dead rats of several that my husband was able to snipe with his bb gun in the backyard.

Yes! Here we are in the backyard.   And here is our garden shed that was filled with trash, which rats had gotten into.

 Trash was heaped in every possible area.  Here is some behind what used to be my kiln shed when I lived in this house.

 Side yard trash a la rats who had ripped up many of the bags.

 Another view of the back deck, which got smashed up by dogs and chewed through by rats because bags of trash were creatively stuffed under the deck.  I'm sure the rats appreciated their sheltered "buffet table".

Like the house, the yard was covered with dog feces, and had all sorts of trash frozen to it.  Including used tampon applicators from bathroom garbage that had been torn apart by rats.  Happy New Year to me!  Those were some fun times, prying that stuff off my frozen yard.

A shot of some sideyard trash.

Back in the house! Here's the basement and I have no idea why the floor was covered with rotting cardboard.  The tenants had also filled in our floor drains with cement, without our permission.

We were on overwhelm so didn't get good pics of all the junk in the basement which included quite a bit of filthy heavy old furniture and plenty more dogshit.  Apparently the whole house was being used as a flophouse.

As a fan of affordable accommodation, in theory it didn't bother me that a bunch of people wanted to share the house.  I actually defended this to a neighbour before the trash started piling up saying good for them! Affordable housing!  I also defended the piles of scrap wood and brush from trimmed trees being heaped in the driveway to be burnt in the stove.  I thought it was clever.  Reduce, reuse recycle.  I'll just say that it would have been nice if the youngsters that flopped here didn't trash the place and stiff us on rent.  At least they had fun painting the walls, though my husband repainted all this for the new tenants.

And, this one photo pretty much sums up the message from our tenants that we were left with. 

That's it for the photo tour, which I feel doesn't quite do justice to how messed up the house was.  There were other things taken, like a really nice shower rod and shower head.  

Some more thoughts:

In case you're wondering how and why we let our house get this bad, it happened over a couple of months while we followed the eviction process.  There was a notice from the city as the trash started to pile up but we didn't remove it ourselves as we wanted to be sure we could get these people out of our house, whoever they were.  There were random people living there who were not on the lease.  If we cleaned the yard and provided heating oil while the random people our tenants let live there occupied it, we feared it could be harder to get vacant possession.

It was a very stressful, uncomfortable couple of months. 

The irony here was that it was only a month-to-month lease, had the tenants been honest with us they could have just given notice, and a lot of this damage could have been avoided.

During the eviction process Delta housekeeping supervisor promised up and down to clean the house, and make sure the pipes wouldn't freeze.  Didn't happen.

My husband and I thought things would improve for us when we completed the tenancy court process and started getting some payments coming in.

Nope.  Only one getting paid here will be BDO Halifax.

Nova Scotian lawmakers, should you like to add cases like ours to the list of "things that survive bankruptcy" we, and I'm sure many many more landlords, would be eternally grateful.

Money aside, I feel like this could be the only way to stop the quiet epidemic of smashed up rental housing in Halifax and elsewhere.  

I really don't think that letting anyone get away with behaviour like this is good for our society.

What are people learning?  That the easy out of a bankruptcy that not only wipes out their legal consequences, but also wipes out their credit card debt, utility debt and student loans. 

Ultimately it appears that it is those of us who budget, respect laws, and live within our means who will pay for those who don't, as irresponsibility is absorbed by creditors like us while folks like BDO get to profit.

I understand that bankruptcy gives precious relief for those who find themselves in difficult circumstances, and I am glad bankruptcy exists for this reason. It is important and humane.  I believe that bankruptcy for most people would be a last resort, and not taken lightly.

However, I question the logic of the Bankruptcy Act being administered by for-profit groups such as BDO.  As the head of BDO Halifax eloquently put it during our conversation when we called to gather information about the bankruptcy process and his company's role:

“There’s this big yellow book called the Yellow Pages and if you turn to B and look under B for bankruptcy you will find there are at least 10 of us.”

And: “if someone down the road is selling widgets, and I’m selling widgets, of course I want people to buy my widget”.  

And "look, this bankruptcy is going ahead and there's nothing you can do about it".  

It was a fascinating, informative conversation because I was surprised to learn that bankruptcy is handled by for-profit companies rather than government organizations.

As an aside, no one at BDO Halifax ever informed us that creditors can ask to be named as "inspectors" on a bankruptcy case.  A lawyer, and a trustee in a different BDO office in another province we called told us about this.  

We finally just mailed back our proof of claim, a confusing document with no guidance provided, and asked to be named inspectors.

I question whether that as the gap between the rich and the poor grows in Canada, these for-profit agents of bankruptcy are presenting young adults with an easy 'get out of jail free' card.   

I find it odd that businesses like this could exist off of bankruptcies.  It means they require a steady supply of bankruptcies to stay afloat.

It makes me wonder if bankruptcies are beginning to be handed out like credit cards on college campuses.

My suspicion is that this reality has the potential to create an entire class of trash-happy young Canadians with nothing to lose that will continually need to be supported by those who choose to work hard and play by the rules.

It is worth noting that our bad-tenant experience is also impacting our credit ratings due to the credit card debt we racked up to cover our losses.  It doesn't seem fair that we're being punished, while our tenants get an easy out. 

The trustee in another province I contacted thoughtfully put the onus on us for not picking better tenants.

Obviously we'd never knowingly rent to people we thought would be capable of allowing our house to end up like this, and a lot of the damage was likely due to people living in the house that we had never even met or interviewed.

I suspect that as foreign investment in Canada drives up the prices on housing, everywhere, and wages stagnate, and education increases in expense, this problem is just going to keep getting worse.  

I think there will be more and more young people who say, screw it, I can just go bankrupt, inspired by these for-profit bankruptcy trustees.  

Maybe economists don't even realize it is a problem, but I wonder what the real cost is to the Canadian economy.  I wonder how this trend, if it is even a trend, can possibly be curtailed.  

Maybe it is too late.  Maybe the ease of bankruptcy is destined to contribute to the gap between the rich and the poor as some people might end up resigned to a life of ruined credit.  

On a broader societal level, the story may also be eye opening as an illustration of the lifestyle that some millennials have decided is appropriate.  Because I know that ours is the only rental property that has ended up this way.  

Maybe my property has inadvertently served as a 'public art installation' referencing a troubled generation.

Whatever the case it still sucks for us.

As much as I hate what these youngsters did to my house, and I hate that I spent so much of 2014 alternating between outrage and depression, I'd like to think I had this experience for a reason.  Maybe by documenting and sharing this story somehow something is going to change.  I suspect this change would require amendments to the Bankruptcy Act.   

I think in the long run these changes would benefit both landlords and tenants, by forcing people to take responsibility for their actions, eg, forcing them to take out their own trash.  Not only could we really use the money, I think it would be good for our tenants to pay their debt to us, even if it takes them years.  I think it would be a positive step towards their behaving as mature members of society.  I thought this is what the justice system was for, and what would happen after all our driving around and fee-paying to adhere to the process.

With respect to the Bankruptcy Act, the head of BDO Halifax made it pretty clear that I'd be wasting my time trying to change how things are.

I reminded him people have managed to change many things in the past.  I said maybe our story belongs on the front page of newspapers.  Maybe how the bankruptcy industry really works is something more people need to be made aware of.

He didn't have much to say to that. 

A few days after this conversation, I spoke to a court administrator, who shared that bankruptcy costs the province all sorts of lost money in terms of lost court fees.  He said he doesn't understand how companies like BDO make money off the bankrupt.  He figured students loans would have to be repaid, and utility companies like Nova Scotia Power would deny hookups until they were paid back.

Not so.  Student loans can be forgiven if they are 7 years old, and when I called up someone in charge of bankruptcy at Nova Scotia Power they said for amounts such as what my tenant owed, they generally wouldn't even bother filing a proof of claim, and by law they can't deny power hook ups to the bankrupt.  At most they may be able to ask for a deposit for new accounts

Bankruptcy then starts to look like a sweet deal for young low income earners: get loans and go study whatever you want, run up your power bills, get credit cards, spend your cash at the bar and on smokes to butt out on the floor of your rental place, fill it with trash and jam out on rent to the next rental place, and then get BDO to wipe your slate clean.

Maybe this explains why during other tenant change-overs we've seen large utility bills get run up as evidenced by bills that were left behind.

This means that responsible rate payers end up covering for the utility bills of the disenfranchised youth.  In a province where everyone is quick to complain about high power bills, it makes me wonder how much our for-profit bankruptcy system is costing those who actually make a point of paying their bills.

Maybe bankruptcy should be handled as part of the provincial justice system, and not justice upheld by the for-profit sector.  

In the current system it looks to me like there is far too much opportunity for corruption and bending of the rules, where we have companies that need people to go bankrupt to make ends meet.  

Were bankruptcy only available through the court system, all fees would go back to the province.  I imagine that this option would be abused much less and people like our tenants would be encouraged to pay the debts to the creditors which won judgements against them.    

I imagine justice would be upheld rather than dribbled away into for-profit trustee fees.

I got this far in the post and wondered if there were any numbers to back up my suspicions.  I didn't look very hard but here's an article indicating that bankruptcies are on the rise among youth:

Younger Canadians More At Risk From Debt

Note this is an article by one of those other for-profit bankruptcy businesses. 

I hope some people with the authority to make changes does look into this issue. 

If the act isn't changed, I'm not sure what the point of the Residential Tenancies Act and tenancy court is.  Maybe instead of a lease landlords may as well just hand their tenants a bag of hammers and hope for the best.